Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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