Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
