I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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