home. puking in laundry basket.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
