I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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