Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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