Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
