I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
