So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
