Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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