Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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