You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
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I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
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I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
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