kristin has been a bad kristin
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.