so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Randomize
