You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
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