Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize