Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize