Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
