He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
