Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
