I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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