at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
