I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
