so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize