Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize