glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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