i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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