i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
