I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I AM VODKA MAN
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
