Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
