So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize