That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
