Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize