oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
