Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha