That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
