I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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