I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize