Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
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