hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
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I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
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I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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