Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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