Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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