dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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