I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize