I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
