I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
