You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
