I just cut my nipple shaving
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
