But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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