What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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