I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
